Taking breaks.
Day 28 of 100 in my 100-day writing project.
If my words seem similar and sound like they did yesterday, then perhaps it is. I'm exhausted. I've got so many fish to fry that I wouldn't know a rubber or silicone one from a real one. Piscine enthusiasts and savers, please don't come after me. Â
But saying I'm exhausted is not going to benefit anyone else, but me. This is my space, and acknowledging it makes me feel true to myself. I want this month to be over, and like I was telling a friend recently, I don't even know what I'm waiting for. November?
If you're working in a 9-5 role with structure and teams, you'd anticipate a promotion, a new career opportunity or a different way to make money. As a freelancer, I don't know what to expect. Everything is a surprise. Everything is a shocker. I don't know when I'm taking my next vacation or 'time off.' And so, I build my own structures.
But me building my own malleable structures can mean only one thing. That the structures are malleable. And so they're bent, twisted or broken. I've learned a few things about myself.
One of that is setting unachievable expectations for myself, and then feeling disappointed if I'm unable to reach them. But the problem is, I know that on a perfectly good day, those very expectations are easy to achieve. I'm learning to bring a balance within these structures; and build a routine to deal with the chaotic swings of my mind. Â
Today, I took it light. I finished up some pending invoice work and set up a few meetings for the upcoming week. By afternoon, I'd curled up on the couch with the TV remote in my hand. I spent hours watching a well-researched documentary. The infovore in me is happy.
Had I felt let down because of my highly set expectations, I would've spent the day feeling miserable. This, perhaps is my 'time off'.
Liked reading about my day? Think you can support me in my 100-day writing project? Buy me a few books, or coffee, or whatever you'd like to buy for me.
